Big, Fat Love Lessons taught by a Greek Wedding

Everyone has to have a crazy family, I am shocked if there are never those weird aunts and uncles at family reunions. At least that's how it is with my family, on both my Moms side as well as my Dads. Which is why I am so excited about this post because it is about one of my favorite movies of all time, My Big Fat Greek Wedding.  My Moms side is full of Eastern Europeans, specifically Slovaks and Croatians so each year at our family reunion there is folk music, folk dancing, weird smelling food, and one of the most complicated language I have ever heard. All the time I keep getting asked questions in Slovak that I cannot answer (I can basically ask for more food, say I want to dance, and say 'I love you') as well as hear stories about the "old country". On my Dads side is all of the Irish, loud, occasionally someone will become an 'Irish hothead', and of course talk about great the Irish rebellion was. Basically I completely understand the loud, large, and always wanting to know your business families. 

My Big Fat Greek Wedding is a timeless classic in my mind, showing the life of Toula Portokalos, a woman who's Greek family, in her mind is over the top. Always in her business, too loud, too large, and way too concerned with her getting married. Toula is first portrayed as awkward, not as lovely as her sister, but a really hard worker as well as incredibly smart. One day while working at her families Greek restaurant, she meets a handsome man Ian Miller, and make a complete fool of herself of course. Toula begins to make changes in herself, taking college classes, buying new clothes, and starts to look good for her. I think that is one of the most important lessons that My Big Fat Greek Wedding gives, that Toula did not simply change for a man, she changed for herself because she became more confident and wanted to portray that confidence. Her confidence leads to going out secretly with Ian. 

While Toula begins to secretly date Ian, she falls in love, becomes engaged, but needs to tell her family. Another lesson is provided during this time of the film, that you will do anything for the person you love. This is shown purely in Ian dealing with Toula's family, their disapproval of him but because he loves her, he makes his best effort in everything. He also tries to understand how Windex can cure everything (if you don't understand that, see the movie it is a huge pop culture reference); basically this entire movie is filled with pop culture references. After many many hilarious stories, the combining of Ian's family and Toula's family, the wedding actually happens and the audience sees Toula appreciate how insane her family is. 

The film depicts a love that is extremely strong, the love within a family, but it also shows how strong the bond is between two people who fall in love and are meant to be together. While yes family can be embarrassing, sometimes overbearing, but in the end there is so much love that everything else doesn't seem to matter. True love is also something that will overcome most everything, both important lessons that the movie teaches. This film is a fantastic movie for how to deal with a crazy family, portray confidence for oneself, and is honestly just a feel good movie. 

10 Things I Hate, but not about this movie

One of the best things about romantic comedies in my opinion is that the male lead usually happens to be a heartthrob. Someone to gawk at and imagine as your next boyfriend all the while realizing that will never happen. Ending in disappointment yes but remembering how much you were entertained by the movie makes it all worth while.

The film 10 Things I Hate About You stars Heath Ledger as the main lead and follows his endeavors and attempts at winning the affection of the female lead Julia Stiles. The film is based off of the story of The Taming of the Shrew written by Shakespeare so the audience already knows it will be a dramatic love story. The film depicts a basic high school with some of the basic high school clique  system but also some unconventional ones as well. Popular attractive people, cowboys, coffee snobs etc. Two sisters at the school fit into different groups of the high school life, one is younger but in the pretty/popular group, while another is incredibly smart but very shrewd (ha! get it?). The story follows two boys who are trying to win over the younger sister, the younger sister is not allowed to date until the Julia Stiles character dates, which everyone knows will never happen because she does not date.

While the movie is greatly entertaining and has its sweet parts, the next part of the summary is actually what is disappointing, how individuals are actually paid to take the older sister on a date and win over her affection. First of all, it is totally ok not to date and be single, being single is one of the best times for a person to figure out who they truly are. This film unfortunately shows a different side, the side of I need someone to be totally happy. This notion is false, completely false and is such a disappointment to see in a generally good movie.

The upside to the lessons taught in 10 Things I Hate About You is that not everything is black and white. There are gray areas in life, somethings are hard to distinguish such as feelings and other emotions. While it is hard to understand the gray area, the parts of life that are black and white should be noted. If a person truly loves someone, act on that feeling, sing them a song, write them a poem, or simply tell that person how you feel. Heath Ledger's character probably had one of the best apologies I have ever seen from a man.

This film actually does contain good lessons such as loving yourself and following your heart which outweighs some of the bad lessons. Honestly this is the movie that I started to base love on, at least form a high school girls perspective. With each romantic comedy released as well as my experiences those perspectives constantly shift.

Pretty Woman, Ugly Truth

As this is my first blog post I will let everyone know now, I am a hopeless romantic. I love, love. Weddings, stories of how people met, cute couples on Instagram are all things I love to see. Naturally, romantic comedies is one of my favorite movie genres and are filled with important lessons on love. Some of these lessons are great, filled with hope and compassion. Other lessons however are filled with hidden agendas and warning signs of unhealthy relationships.

The critically acclaimed movie Pretty Woman, stars Julia Roberts as a prostitute who is hired by Richard Gere to spend the week with him, accompanying him to parties and social events. The movie is seen as one of the best romantic comedies and is probably up at the top for many women's favorite movie. This movie shows a different side of relationships, starting with simple interest and transforming into love. However there are some concerning moments in the movie that make me question what love is supposed to look like to the director.

There is a transformation scene where Julia Roberts is getting transformed into this classy looking woman and Richard Gere is buying her many expensive clothes to help her in this transformation. During the scene Julia continues to look towards Richard for his approval, constantly wanting a nod or a smile that seems endearing at first but is really just creepy. There is a sense of control that is unhealthy in the relationship, since Richard's character has the wealth he has the power which is actually kind of scary. A lesson portrayed in the movies is, you need to change who you are to please your man, while also letting him make the decisions in changing you.

Money is the main drive in the beginning of the relationship between the two main characters and is a constant factor in the trials and tribulations in the relationship. While money is a factor, affection is a problem. While the relationship grows both people try and show more affection but it's hard. Everyone knows showing someone you care is scary, there is a sense of uncertainty constantly around you as you try and understand what the other person is feeling. This is another lesson the movie provides, do not be afraid to show affection and open yourself up.

The last disappointing lesson I learned from Pretty Woman is that I need rescuing. In reality I need a partner in my life who is going to make me a better person and grow with me as we continue our lives. I do not need a man to come in flashing money and gifts because I am perfectly fine on my own. I wish the movie gave the audience a more uplifting feeling in the film but it simply doesn't. Instead it gives lessons on warning signs of unhealthy relationships and that money is everything. An entertaining movie but not a good guide to love.